Serenity Kindle Edition

Serenity is not the absence of chaos; it's learning how to exist within it without losing myself.I didn't arrive here with clarity. I'm still walking forward without a direction set in stone. Guided more by hope than certainty. Hope that life can feel softer than it once did. Hope that I won't always carry the weight of who I used to be within my skeleton's bones. Hope that something better is waiting for me, even if I have to become someone new to reach it's divine frequency.Reclaiming my life hasn't been sunshine and rainbows. I still get triggered by memories my body remembers, even when my mind tries to forget. Old patterns creep in, tempting me to return to versions of myself I once believed were all I deserved to be. There are moments I slip, where the disease of addiction has me questioning everything I've worked toward. My healing journey hasn't been easy. It's been a constant tug-of-war between who I was and who I'm becoming.Late nights in my head. Battles no one sees. The exhaustion of trying to change while carrying every trauma I've survived. The anger, the grief, the longing, and the fragile moments of peace that remind me to feel grateful I'm not where I used to be. Serenity isn't something I find; it's something I teach my nervous system is safe to hold onto.In the way I speak to myself. In the boundaries I set. In the decision to stay when running away feels easier. I'm learning that the love I give myself sets the standard for the love I receive. That the reflection I see in the mirror will eventually reflect, to show up in the people I allow close to me. I don't have to abandon myself anymore just to feel I'm loved.This isn't a story about having it all figured out.We're all a working in progress; don't deny the growth.It's about choosing to keep moving forward, even on the days you feel like giving up. Read more